MEN DRINKING TEA
I almost couldn’t write this post. One of the things that struck Susie and me the most about Morocco was the number of sidewalk tea shops with only men in them, often solitary, one at a table, drinking tea. We almost never saw a women in one of these tea shops which were everywhere.
So when I decided to wonder about this I searched through my photographs for pictures of men sitting in tea shops, expecting there to be dozens of them. And to my surprise I found only a few, taken by accident, and not typical at all.
I guess men sitting in a tea shop in brown clothing, one at each table, didn’t seem worth a photograph. Instead I seem to have only photographed shops with bright colors and fruit stands of which I have hundreds.
But I can assure you the men drinking tea are there. This photo is of a group of men who meet regularly to talk. We saw this again and again, to, six or seven men sitting at a table, leaning toward each other and gesticulating, having intense conversations, with their teapots on the table in front of them.
We saw women in their long robes in groups of two or three walking in the streets having intense conversations, but not in tea shops. And groups of girls would walk the streets talking loudly and laughing with each other and pulling each other’s arms. So it isn’t as if the women and girls were reserved or stayed hidden. They just weren’t in the tea shops.
I don’t know what to make of this. I know my Asheville men’s group of about five us, all connected to Warren Wilson College, count our weekly meeting at McDonalds, where the senior coffee is cheap and we can sit for as long as we want, as a high point of the week. Even though I got in from Morocco at 1 a.m. after a 25 hour trip, I was at McDonalds at 10 a.m. along with the others.
We talk about politics and history and baseball and sometimes health issues. Our wives over the years met once a week or went on walks together and talked about daily issues and inquired how everyone was doing. When they queried us men about the health of our spouses or friends after our meetings we had no idea, it hadn’t crossed our minds.
So I am sure there are similar differences in Morocco. I understand why the men sit together and talk, but not why women are never invited or why so many men sit alone in tea shops and drink tea. We did learn how to make tea. First you stuff a silver pot full of fresh peppermint and then pour hot water over it and let it steep. When you pour it into the small glass from which you drink it you lift the pot as you pour so that you are pouring from three feet up, still hitting the small glass. This gives a kind of foam. If there isn’t enough foam you pour the tea back in the pot and do it again, and again, until it foams. Why you want it to foam and how you learn to pour like this I didn’t find out just as I never found out why men sit alone in tea shops drinking tea.
BILLYBABA’S WANDERING 