TRIBALISM AGAIN
After sharing the same double bed with my brother after he joined me at Lili’s Airbnb for a week, he flew to Italy where both he and his wife, Chris, have come down with Covid, feeling uncomfortably sick, quarantining and ruining their Italian vacation. I just self tested and am negative and probably safe for now.
I have no idea what protocol to follow. In France everyone wore masks on the Metro but not outdoors at cafes or while strolling, after they spent months being very careful. In England there are constant requests over the sound system and signs everywere asking people to wear masks on public transportation. Almost no one does.
I am a herd person, we are all herd people. When everyone takes off their masks I feel like a fool if I wear mine. When in Paris and London I was a know nothing tourist and could do what I pleased without embarrassment. But here I feel stupid if I wear a mask. Two months ago everyone here was expected to wear a mask, and then with Covid not changing, we all decided not to. It is particularly hard wearing a mask with people I love. And yet I am fairly certain that it is people I love that are the greatest risk to give me Covid. It was probably Chris that gave Richard Covid, or if he already had it I was at great risk from a person I love. That seems to make me more safe to travel where I don’t know people than to stay here and be with the people I love without a mask.
And it looks as if this uncertainly about what to do is going to continue indefinitely like flu or the common cold.
My problem is that I am a tribal person who needs both to escape the tribe and to be hugged by it. My intuition is of no help at all, it makes me want to fit in or escape irrationally, and tribalism addles my brain so that I can’t reason clearly. No use listening to anyone else, either. So what is an octogenarian to do?
As a footnote, Richard and Chris say they have never felt so sick in their lives. Chris can’t smell and her day after day constant headaches are splitting her head and feel like a brain tumor. And now they may have trouble finding a flight home because the flights are booked full as airlines cut flights. Their coughing is continuous and wrenchingly painful. I am listening to them and am wearing my mask even if I embarrass my friends and the people I care most about most and the rest of my tribe. That’s all an octogenarian can do.
BILLYBABA’S WANDERING 